


then came the rain

by kioku96



Category: Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Gen, just pondering things in the rain, short drabble fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:01:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26218294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kioku96/pseuds/kioku96
Summary: He was certain Van would succeed and destroy the object of his hatred, yet, before he realized it, from within the depths of his resentment came a storm with a chilling rain, clawing its way into his thoughts and casting an uncomfortable uncertainty of a future he originally thought to be set in stone.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	then came the rain

It was raining.

There was a soft drumming of droplets falling on the courtyard pavement as Sync stood alone, lost in thought.

The faint light cast from the interiors of the cathedral was the only thing that invaded the darkness that concealed his position, though not many would notice him as they were sheltered behind granite walls, winding down and calling it a night.

It was late, yet the exhaustion from the day’s work was not enough to stop the thoughts and ache within that kept him awake.

How long had he been standing here, pondering his own existence?

The act in itself held little to no meaning in a sense, given that Sync had told himself from the start that his sole existence and purpose at this point was to aid Van in destroying the score, the very thing that brought upon his birth into this wretched world. He himself had no other reason to live outside of this, so to think about anything else would be unnecessary and unlike him.

He was certain Van would succeed and destroy the object of his hatred, yet, before he realized it, from within the depths of his resentment came a storm with a chilling rain, clawing its way into his thoughts and casting an uncomfortable uncertainty of a future he originally thought to be set in stone.

He could only scoff at himself.

How ironic, to think of the future he wished for to be one ‘set in stone.’ It was as if no matter how much he rejected the score, his life revolved heavily around it. He didn’t exist within the score, and yet, the score existed within him.

He didn’t belong in the story the score sang, yet his anger of his own existence could only be described as a result of being excluded from having a role in itself. His emotions seemed to be in conflict with each other, one desiring to be born with a role and yet another despising the very thought of it.

But was this not the reason he had sought Van, the one who had given him a role that the score had denied him of? How pathetic, to fall into such desperation and depravity in order to feel some form of validation for something that was the center of his suffering.

Had he been given a role, or rather, a place in this world, would he even be the same person he is now? Would he be no different than the very people he had mocked?

Would he have been given the chance to understand what happiness is?

Thus this brought him back to his original thoughts which clouded his mind, forming a mist that seemed to hide a road once clear and true to its destination.

It was like his resolve was crumbling in wake of a rain that dulled the flames of his rage that boiled his blood.

He found himself wondering if this was a path he had no choice to follow, or if it was just the easiest path in terms of giving himself some form of meaning. To follow Van and obey all of his orders.

At what point did he desire to know if there were options in his life other than the one he was initially given? To have a purpose where he could pave his own story? To actually feel  _ alive? _

The very thought made him shiver.

He was losing sight of his goals and straying from everything he ever was.

It was dangerous territory.

No matter how much he tried to push these thoughts away, they always returned with a vengeance whenever he came face to face with Luke and his party of ‘heroes.’ They turned their back on the score and desired to create their own futures, to live lives outside of the script given to them.

They were also rebelling against the score, yet it was different from what Van was doing.

Both sides wanted the same thing, but why were they so different? The more Sync looked, the more he couldn’t look away.

Wasn’t it their fault for the rain? Or had he always been in the rain until now? Then what would that make them?

Just watching them made him question himself and he hated every moment he felt like this.

He didn’t want to think his resolve was weak. That his loyalty to Van was as cheap as his own existence.

To think just maybe... 

He was on the wrong side.


End file.
